RECYCLED: A RELUCTANT SEARCH FOR TRUE SELF THROUGH NURTURE, NATURE AND FREE WILL by Jack Rocco
What a fascinating book about a man who was adopted, was a very successful orthopedist, and later on began to research his and other people’s experience with adoption. Because the author is a physician, when he looks at adoption it is with a scientist’s eye as well as someone struggling to understand his own, unique adoption story. It interesting that he first really gets interested in adoption after a first date with a young woman who was also adopted. Fortunately, Dr. Rocco was raised in a loving, rather close working- class Italian family that gave him the love, self-confidence and freedom to do whatever he wanted in life.
Dr. Rocco points out that no child is a blank slate and leaving the birth mother is a primal wound, not one to be glossed over. Throughout the book Dr. Rocco peppers the text with humor and real-life situations, giving the reader insights into medical school, the military where he served in Japan, and charitable work that takes him to Madagaskar. At the same time, he says, “I was driving the vehicle I called my life much too fast and felt as if it was ready to fly off the road at any minute.”
What he discovers about himself and how he integrates into his life story is the essence of this book. In the process of this, he reexamines the idea of “recycled kids,” saying adoption is not the simple process many of us were led to believe it was and it has ramifications that need to be considered on the lives of the birth parents, the adoptive family and especially on the child. Interestingly, Dr. Rocco says, “Humans are intimately tied to their stories and their lies and sometimes its difficult to differentiate between the two.
The book also presents a lengthy, scientific and philosophical discussion about nurture versus nature and free will, which is really a major part of the book and well worth rereading.
I urge anyone to read this who wants to know more about adoption and its ramifications on all involved. But the book is more than that: it is also, the story of a really interesting man who, while struggling to find his roots, presents a very honest portrait of a man searching to make his life meaningful.